BDSM stands for "Bondage/Discipline" "Dominance/Submission" "Sadism/Masochism". A person into BDSM may or may not be into all of these categories. You will also hear the terms "S&M" (sadism & masochism), "S/M" (Sex Magick), and "D/s" (Dominance/submission). While these are all erotic sexual practices, most people in "the Scene" will tell you that 50-75% of it is mental/emotional.

Sometimes people in a regular relationship ("vanilla") try tying each other up once in a while, or act out a spanking scene, to spice up their love life. At the other extreme, there are those who are "24/7", people who live in a "Total Power Exchange" (TPE) with the Dominant partner having total control over all aspect of the submissive partner's life.

The catch-phrase you will hear most often is SAFE-SANE-CONSENTUAL. SAFE -- looking out for each other's personal safety. SANE -- looking out for each other's mental/emotional health. CONSENTUAL -- Both partners are of legal age, and are making their choices with informed consent.

BDSM does not mean rape, it does not mean emotional and physical abuse or battering. If you did not consent, it shouldn't happen.

It all sounds very interesting but are you up to it? that's another post for my blog.